| |
| |
|
|
|
Which Came First, Love or Marriage?
I came across an article today: LOVE AND MARRIAGE THE TORAH'S CRITERIA by Rivka Olenick. It helped me think about my own marriage, and the way that many couples approach the idea of being together before they get married vs. what they think after the wedding. People often believe they know what love is after seeing a limited view of their spouse-to-be. When they're asked, "why do you guys want to get married?" They say, "I just love the way he [fill in the blank]." or "She and I have so much in common". But when a real test comes, like always having to pick her socks or dealing with his less than average meals (sic), both parties become greatly disenchanted. After they have the opportunity to discover more about the other person, the "love" fades and resentment moves in. So what does it take to make it work? Of the happy couples I've talked with, most attribute their happiness to the real love that grows after marriage. Often times it's not a pretty love. Partners may have to get dirty, like gardeners who expect good things to grow after they've done the work and have overcome their selfishness. This kind of love grows when they lose a loved one but can find comfort from God and each other during their grief. It's the kind of love that develops when they are in danger of losing their house or job, but can see beyond their circumstances. Or it's the kind that matures when they're able to overcome adultery and find forgiveness not only heals, but seals their bond to one another. This love is not an overnight love. It doesn't come quick, and it is a challenge for our microwave society. But these couples keep pressing on, believing that happiness can be achieved. Fortunately, for most persevering couples, it is. For all those people out there who are engaged or thinking about marriage, my suggestion to you? Find one of these couples who can be trusted. Model them and let them mentor you. If you don't know someone personally, email couples@marriagementors.org to find out how to get help with your relationship. Finally, I'd like to leave you with this thought from the article I read: "...marriages are contracted not as a result of passion and romance, but as a result of good judgment and sound reason. If the couple is well suited, the marriage will result in love and happiness. Marriages based on pre-marital infatuation, however, all too often fail the test of married life." Keep your faith during the hard times. Keep your head when you want to lose it. And your heart will believe in a love greater than you can imagine. Keishia Lee-Louis is the Editor and Publisher of http://www.Married4Good.com (launching November 2005). Her work has appeared on iVillage.com, BibleResourceCenter.com, and in numerous other printed publications. Currently, she lives with her husband, daughter and son and is writing a book on marriage and relationships which will be published Spring 2006. If you'd like to see more of her work, visit http://married4good.blogspot.com
MORE RESOURCES: Buy Website Internet Traffic. Website online advertising. Buy full page popunder advertising and increase website traffic to your sites. Bad Credit Loans - Loans for people with bad credit. Access online government grants and financial credit services instantly online. Digital Streaming Radio On Your Mobile Phone - La Vella Mobile Radio. La Vella Mobile Radio Gives You Access To Over One Hundred Of The Hottest Streaming Radio Stations From Around The World And Brings Them To The Palm Of Your Hand, Right On Your Mobile Phone. Get Streaming Radio On Your Cell Phone! Audio And Video Streaming For Multimedia Purposes. This Is A Complete Step By Step Guide To The Beginners Who Want To Install And Setup Audio And Video Streaming For Multimedia Purposes On The Internet.
|
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Planning A Backyard Wedding So many couples are planning to have their wedding at locations that are symbolic to them. A popular place for this is their parents or relative's backyard. The Bachelor Party: A Guide For The Best Man If you forget the ring, there is still a chance that you might be forgiven. If you throw a poor bachelor party, you might as well throw away your friendship. Wedding Planning Depending on your personal preferences and the preferences of your husband or wife-to-be, a wedding can take anywhere from 6 weeks to 2 years to plan. If one step in the planning process is missed, the whole wedding could be ruined. Wedding Bouquets for Life One of the most beautiful of the bride's adornments at a wedding is the bouquet. Normally constructed of fresh flowers, the wedding bouquet would last for a week or two, and then have to be dried or tossed. Honeymooning on the Waves Cruising down the river was always deemed by couples the ultimate romantic date. You can't be much more together alone than when you're separated from the rest of the world by sheets and sheets of water. Wedding Cake Design Through History The design of the traditional wedding cake has varied greatly over time. Once a sign of fertility, the wedding cake of the Roman Empire was made of wheat or Barley. Extreme Age Differences In Marriage Can Lead To Infidelity "Extreme age differences between husband and wife may lead to infidelity" says author and infidelity expert, Ruth Houston, who was recently quoted in an article in First magazine. Houston's comments were included in the sidebar of an article in the May issue of First entitled "The Surprising Way Women Are Turning Back the Clock," which discusses the pros and cons of marriages and relationships in which the woman is considerably older or younger than the man. Your Bridal Shoes: No Need to Sacrifice Style for Comfort Think your bridal gown is the most important garment you'll need for your wedding? Think again! Your shoes could make or break your day. When your feet hurt, it shows on your face, and you only want smiles on your wedding day. Wedding Loans: Perfect Finance Option for a Perfect Wedding After seeing each other for years and being tagged as 'in love' since eternity, you desire to bring this to a logical end. You are wrong if you think I am suggesting a divorce even before you are actually married. Who Wants to Be Rich? Well you may not become a billionaire or even a millionaire, but research shows that marriage helps couples and individuals generate more income and wealth than singles, and even cohabitating couples.According to The Marriage Project researchers out of Rutgers University in New Jersey,". Eight Ways to Divorce Proof Your Marriage 1) Write a mission statement:Most brides spend more time planning for their wedding day than for the marriage itself and are unprepared for what happens after the "I do." More than half of newlyweds will struggle to maintain a fraction of the friendship they now enjoy with their spouse. How to Select a Wedding Photographer Selecting a wedding photographer can be a daunting task. Not only does the photographer need to be able to produce outstanding memories of your wedding day but also has to be able to fit into the celebration and be highly professional every step of the way. Three Ingenious Anniversary Gift Ideas If you have met the person or the couple several times you must be familiar with how they express themselves. Therefore, one of the best anniversary gift ideas would be to portray that pose through a life-size pencil sketch and frame it in bamboo or white plywoodAnniversary gift ideas should have sentimental values. Hawaii Honeymoon Vacations - Romanticizing Your Honeymoon! Hawaii honeymoon vacations could take you to a miracle trip to the most enchanting beaches of Hawaii. There are beaches, long and beautiful across the world but none of them could be a match for the ultimate Hawaii beaches. A Call for International Marriage Laws I recently watched a CNN programme which centred on "kidnapped daughters" (from multicultural marriages) who were unwillingly given away in marriages in Islamic states by their fathers. Usually, the fathers were from these Islamic states. Bridal Jewelry: Fulfilling a Wedding Tradition 'Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.' This is a saying that many brides take to heart when considering their wedding trousseau. 10 Common Wedding Reception Mistakes Every bride wants a fairytale wedding. Therefore, this article is to try and minimize problems that may occur during a wedding reception. Wedding Frames - Are Your Wedding Photographs Safe? One of the top priorities on a wedding day is to make sure every moment is captured with great photographs. These once-in-a-lifetime memories are irreplaceable and making sure these photographs are properly stored and displayed after the wedding should be just as important. Wedding Reception Entertainment - Choose Wisely When planning your wedding, what type of entertainment are you looking for? A comedian? A clown? A 3-ring circus? Of course not ? you are looking for high quality entertainment that is tailored to your vision for this once-in-a-lifetime event. Your wedding reception entertainment should tie together all the things you have been dreaming of for many, many months. 3 Easy Steps to Buying the Right Engagement Ring You've made the plunge, you've decided to get married. Congratulations!Don't think about it now, but there are many things you need to think about before the big wedding day comes, and one of them is how are you going to find the right engagement ring?Before the stress settles in, here are 3 easy steps to finding and buying the right engagement ring.
|
